Sunday, February 8, 2015

Welcome 2015

This post is almost 2 months behind. Mostly because our home computer has crashed so the only thing we have is an iPad. It's small and always being used. I just have to wait my turn. Today is my turn. 

I had some down time today. I stayed home from church because I was not feeling well. I'm not showered and it is almost 5 in the evening, but I have been occupied. I read the Sunday School manual. We are discussing the teachings of Pres. Benson this year. I don't remember much of him growing up and reading about him as made me realize I was missing out! I also finished a poem I have been working on. It is the first one in 10 years; I feel so accomplished! 

Usually my first entry for the year is letting everyone know what my word for the year is. Last year my word was LIVE. I wanted to truly live my life on purpose. I just didn't want to survive it. I feel I did okay, but know I could have done better. My word for 2015 is:

AWAKE

I've thought long and hard about this. The reason I chose it is my goal this year is to rediscover my talents. Things about me that make me, well, ME! I'm not wanting to develop new talents  
(although that would be cool if it happens in the process), I just want to awaken the ones that I have been letting sleep inside of me for years. I'm not sure why I allowed that to happen, but I have. It's just time to wake them up!

It felt good to write that poem. I'll be honest, it was hard! I used to be able to write pretty well and quickly. Not this time. It took me over a week and my mind felt like mush...but it's done! And, I'm happy to have taken the first step. Now on to the next!

Sound Advice from a 9 Year-old

Keeping this blog updated is always on my mind, but one of my very last priorities- sad, I know. Being the mom of six kids doesn't allow me to do all I want in one day. I, like everybody else, must choose the things I want to occupy my time. Usually, my time is consumed with work, cleaning, cooking, cleaning some more, night routines and then if I'm lucky, a little break before I end up falling asleep on the couch. Today was different. Why? Because I wanted it to be. Today I wanted to remember the words of my 9 year-old daughter.

This week a friend of mine lost her little boy. He was 5 years old. Tomorrow is his funeral. I am quite certain that she is anxiously gathering ANYTHING that will remind her who this little boy was.

The writing that caught my attention belonged to my 9 year-old. In her rush this morning, she ended up leaving her pink fluffy, heart decorated journal on the counter- see why I'm always cleaning? I came home from work, grabbed myself a little snack, and sat down to read what insight a 9 year-old might have (just call me Marie Barone). She's not my first 9 year-old, so I knew I was in for a treat. What I didn't expect was how wise her words might be.

After skimming a lot of pages with hand drawn hearts, flowers, and even a few talking about how much she loved the twins from "Suit Life", I came to her last entry. It wasn't dated, so I don't know when she wrote this, but her words will be timeless. Now, I must tell you that Becca loves to sing. She loves music. I love this about her. Because of this talent, she has been writing songs for a very long time. This is the song I read of hers today:

"Follow Your Own Heartbeat"

Walking down the wrong road,
don't know what to do.
Everybody expects me to be like you.
But, I want my own life.
I want my own heartbeat.
All I seem to do is listen your heartbeat.
I don't want to do that my whole life.
I just want to be my own person,
listen to my own heartbeat.
Don't tell me what to do.
I don't even know you.

My heart breaks for my friend. I cannot even begin to imagine how she is handling this heartbreak. She will be in my thoughts and prayers, all of them. She has 8 children. She is an amazing woman and friend. It is not something I ever wish to experience, but because of it I will hold my kids tighter and I will watch them more closely. I don't want to ever forget any part of them.