Terrible Mom Award: Newest Recipient

I woke up late today. I was tired because we currently have a baby who likes to sleep in our bed. He doesn't sleep vertical, mind you. No. He sleeps horizontal. We have a king size bed, but our 8 month old takes the majority of the space. Dustin and I are left with the two outside slivers, just enough so you don't fall out of the bed. I'm not happy about it!

This morning was also a bad day for listening kids. In our home, they were absent. I had to ask my youngest girls several times to get ready, eat breakfast, get your teeth brushed and your shoes on. Several times! I finally told them I was leaving and walked out the door. Who was I taking to school then? They quickly ran out, still getting ready, but hurrying  so I wouldn't leave them.

Is it any wonder why I finally lost it in the car? Who was the lucky child? Rebecca. Of all of my kids she has the most personality and is drama galore. I wasn't in the mood for it this morning. She keeps acting like a dinosaur and makes the most annoying roar. Every time I ask her to stop she responds she is trying to create an awkward moment (who doe a that?). I turned around and yelled, " Rebecca, I have had enough. Enough of that! Quit trying to be so loud. It's annoying! We all know that you're here!" She was quiet the rest of the way. So was I. I felt horrible. I just yelled at my sweet, funny, smart 8 year old! I love her! Why would I do that?

When we pulled into the parking lot, I turned around to apologize. All I got out was , "Becca, I love you." She broke out in tears. I felt awful. I spent the next few minutes trying to explain my behavior, but there was no use. There is no excuse for it. I gave her a hug and told her goodbye. I'm on my way to pick her up. I hope she'll forgive me. Knowing he,r she will. And, I will be better because of it!

Marriage Advice

The other day, I received a message on Facebook from one of my Laurels I had taught quite a few years back. In it, she was thanking me for a note I had written before she was married.You see, I was Laurel adviser for over 6 years. One of our yearly activities was to create a marriage time capsule. We would shop for wedding dresses, pick wedding colors, we even made some scrapbook pages where they could add their pictures. I also put in a poem my mom wrote titled, "Prince Charming." The last thing I put in was a note to each girl with my words of wisdom on being married- this makes me chuckle because I was still new to marriage!! 

This got me thinking what else I would tell them now that I have been married for almost 17 years. Honest, I'm not sure I remember what I wrote the first time. I know that there are many more qualified to give marriage advice out there, but I do have a few years and learning experiences under my belt. I think I can share what I have learned. These are in no particular order, but the first REALLY is my #1!

1. When you are mad at your spouse, do something kind for him. I can't tell you how many times this has changed a bad situation to a good one. I can also remember the first time I tried it. Dustin and I had a fight and I was so angry. It was right before church (nice, I know). He hurried to get in the shower. We were running late because of the argument. I was tempted to leave him and just go without him. The thought came to my mind to iron his shirt. I was like," WHAAAT?" I did it anyway. That one small act calmed my anger and took it away. I still do it today.

2. Talk to your spouse the way you want to be talked to. Nobody likes to be talked down to, yelled at, or even called names. When you are first married, it's hard to believe it will even happen, but sometimes we lose control and regret the things that come out of our mouths.

3. Take an interest in what your spouse likes to do. Do you really think I love the whole hunting thing? No, but it's important to Dustin, so it should be important to me! My husband is an avid TV watcher. I would rather do something more active, but at night he likes to veg. He likes it when I'm right next to him! I love seeing him happy!

4. Have date nights! The time Dustin and I spend together without kids is priceless to me! He really loves being with our kids, so I know he does it more for me. He knows that during the day I don't get much adult interaction, so he will ask me out on a date. I love it! It is also a time for us to remember why we love each other.

5. Make cell phones off limits at night. We are still working on this. I feel it takes time from what would be communicating time and reconnecting time.

6. Learn to make goals together. It creates unity in your marriage. This is a hard one for us, as Dustin thinks goals are stupid.....

7. Learn to take criticism. We are not all perfect. We all realize this once the honeymoon is over. In order to live without killing each other, you are going to have to know what you do that bothers your spouse. It doesn't mean he hates you, but if it's a big problem you are going to have to make some changes.

8. I would follow #7 with, DON"T LET EVERYTHING BOTHER YOU!!!!!! We do not wash the dishes the same, we do not put toilet paper on the same way,  we don't cook the same, we don't clean the same, we don't do laundry the same BECAUSE we are NOT the same!!!! Get over it!!!!

9. Read and pray together. If you're not super religious, meditate together. Quiet time, is great time!!

10. Be willing to admit you're wrong. I will admit this is my weakness! I'm terrible!!! Dustin is always the first to apologize. The few times I've swallowed my pride, it made the situation a whole lot better.

11. Be merciful and kind with one another. We all have weaknesses we need to work on and don't need someone always pointing them out. Have a little mercy and learn to dwell on what you love about your spouse instead.

 I could probably keep going, but I won't. I'll add more in another 10 years. I'm pretty sure I'll have learned a whole bunch more. That's the beauty of marriage. Through it, you continue to learn and to grow. That's it's purpose!!

Our Time at Grandpa and Grandma Merritt's

I can't believe it has been three months since writing last! We have been truly blessed in our time without our own home. We are so grateful to the families that have taken all 8 of us in. That is not easy!!

I thought it would be fun to write down the kids' favorite memories of staying with their grandparents over the summer. We moved in May 17, 2013 and moved out August 17, 2013. There were lots of things to choose from, but here were the top runners.

Ryan-

1. Sleeping in the trailer. For those who may not have known, the girls, Dustin, baby, and I all slept in the house. The boys slept in a trailer in the driveway. I know they enjoyed having their own privacy and a place to get a way.

2. Painting the birdhouses. Grandpa and Grandma's birdhouses in their backyard needed some refreshing. Our kids were up for the task and it turned out to be a good memory made.

3. Going to the movies. Grandma took all the kids to the movies, so Dustin and I could have some quiet time. They saw Despicable Me 2.

Aaron-

1. The food! Grandma is a good cook! He loved her homemade mac-n-cheese.

2. Building the birdhouses. I would say Aaron helped the most out of everyone. he really enjoyed being in the shed with Grandpa.

3. Making my quilt. Aaron was able to make a new bedroom quilt for his bed. He wanted something outdoorsy. He even helped tie it! It has bears on it and is black and green.

Grace-

1. A dessert every night- yes, I gained 8 lbs at Grandma's. Her favorite was her chocolate bundt cake.

2. Making my young Women's quilt. Grandma helped her tie a quilt with all 8 values represented and even had her name embroidered on it.

3. Going on lots and lots of field trips to the store.

Kate-

1. Going to the library and completing a reading challenge. Grandma took them out for shakes after they completed it.

2. Playing Hang Man. Was a nightly favorite. One time her and Grandma ended up with the same word. The topic given was names. They both spelled out Suzanne. How funny is that?!

3. Painting the birdhouses. The girls didn't help make them, but they all got to paint one!

Becca-

1. Grandpa's smoked meat- my kids like to eat! Her favorite was the smoked pork shoulder. Yummy!

2. Just getting to spend time with them at their house.

3. Going to Lava Hot Springs- a post will come soon!

Britten-

1. Learned to sit up. When we moved, he was only 4 months old. He started sitting up about 5 months.

2. Started eating baby food. He is an awful eater! He does everything, but eat!! He earned the name Bucking Bronco.

3. He was almost crawling when we left. When we left, he was 7 months old! They grow so fast in that time!!

We are so grateful to Russ and Lori for taking us in. It was nice to spend time with them and I love that my kids made their own memories. Here are a few snapshots.

 We spent a lot of time in the backyard. In the evening we were in the shade, so it was nice and cool.

 

 What Britten looked like when we moved at 4 months old.

What he looks like now.

 We had concerts put on for us. The Evil Twins were performing on this night.

 

 We spent time in the front yard too. On this day we watched a baby bird learning how to fly with his mama.

 They were able to provide service. We helped put welcome packets together for a battered women shelters. The packets were going to the one in Kaysville. The organization was call Hearts Knot Together.

 Tying quilts

 Grandpa, Britten, and Aaron

Lava Hot Springs