Feeling Wanted

Every stay-at-home mom has those days (maybe longer) when you just don't feel as though you matter, make a difference, or even count sometimes (if you never do, please don't tell me). The monotony sometimes swallows me up and I assume I'm trapped, stuck, forever in it.

Last week I received a phone call from a former employer. When I was 19, I worked for a daycare. I was the preschool teacher and I loved it! The kids were always so happy to be there, most of the time. The daycare was located in a lower-income area. Some of the kids' needs were not met as well as they should have been. I remember sitting and brushing their hair getting them ready for the day. On a number of occasions I would end up driving some home for the mom. I cared about these kids! Anyway, back to my story...

She called me wondering If I would consider coming back for half a day, 8-12. I was flattered by the offer but quickly came up with reasons why I couldn't. She said she understood, but would love if I came to see what she has done with the center and chat with her a while. I agreed.

When I arrived, I couldn't believe how much had changed. She had greatly improved the facility and as I walked around I was thinking how great it was for the kids. We went into her office and talked. She told me how great she thought I would be. She had remembered that I loved teaching. She was right, I did love teaching. She told me the pay would be about $800/mo. Who couldn't use an extra $800? She also would allow me to bring my daughter and my nephew& niece, who I already watch, free of charge. Very tempting.

I told her I would give it a lot of thought and talk it over with my husband, gave her a hug, and left.

Dustin and I tossed the idea around all weekend long. We thought how nice the extra money would be, if his sister didn't mind. We could probably afford to build the house we've been hoping for. We started getting a little excited. Then reality set in.

Having a job would be more demanding of my time. It would also take me from home. Even though the kids would be with me, they wouldn't have my full attention. I would have to give up my gym in the morning. I would have somebody telling me what to do. My schedule would no longer be flexible to my liking. The list went on and on. I was now confused.

I prayed to know. Nothing. What does that mean? Prayed some more and still the same feeling. Now I'm even more confused and a little frustrated. "What should I do?" That's the thought that kept nagging at me all weekend long.

Sunday night, after all family had left, Dustin and I were able to talk about it again. Monday came. She needed her answer today. I was still going crazy. I hadn't talked to Dustin's sister, or the mom of the baby I watch part time. I really didn't know what to do.

I have always planned on working when my kids were older, not because I would have too, but because I enjoy it. I couldn't think of a better part time job to have when I start school. It would be so nice and I know they would be flexible. I needed to clear my head, so I went to the gym.

When I got back, I asked Dustin what he thought. He said this, (I will never forget it):

"Larae, it's funny. While you were gone I missed you. Then I started thinking about you having to be gone everyday. I love it when you are here. It's nice."

That was all I needed. I called her and said, "Not this time, but maybe in the future."

One day I would like to find myself in the workforce again, but the feeling of being wanted and needed in my home out weighs everything!

A New Calling and Family Memories

The busyness of last week is still fresh in my mind and I don't want to forget any of it.

On the 4th we were called into our Stake President's office. Dustin was extended a new calling. We were both shocked! We were very comfortable with him as our ward's Young Men's Secratary. The perfect calling to fit his sometimes crazy schedule and it allowed him to be home.

By Tuesday everything had sunk in. Our week was going better. Wednesday came and then Thursday. We went to dinner and did temple sealings with our good friends the Kimballs. They are always fun and we love catching up.

Friday, I was excited! My family was coming into town for the mission farewell of my niece and nephew. My mom and sister, Robyn, stayed with me Friday night. We attended our annual ward Christmas party. Robyn really enjoyed a guitar solo of Jingle Bells. After it was over, she leaned in and said, "Larae, did you hear what he put in at the end?" I told her I didn't catch it. She said, " He played: Jingle Bells, Batman smells. Robin laid an egg." She thought he was so clever. It was my chuckle for the day.

Saturday I took Robyn shopping for Christmas. We went to Seagull Book. She loves to read LDS fiction. My mom came with us. Later that night we all met at Temple Square to see the lights. I wish I had remembered to pack my camera.

You would have gotten a laugh out of our group. There were 30+ 0f us trying to wander through the huge crowds with a wheelchair. Many times we had to wait for others to catch up. Eventually we all decided we had seen enough and went back to my van for hot chocolate and donuts. I will say that was the best part.

Sunday we all woke up to get ready for the farewell. Dustin and I snuck into our ward so he could be sustained as the new Stake Young Men's President. No more gliding by for us. He will be busy and it will require A LOT of his time, but we're up for the challenge.

We were all ready by noon and headed up to Kaysville, UT. Sydnee and Trevor gave excellent talks on the scripture, John 14:15, "If ye love me, keep my commandments." They are so ready and will serve the Lord well.

I was sad to see my family go. It always breaks my heart to say goodbye. It's hard living so far away. However, I am grateful. Because we don't see eachother everyday, each moment we share is not taken for granted. I am thankful for all the memories we make together.

Our week kept us on out toes for sure, but I wouldn't have it any other way!

A Time for Thanksgiving

Autumn is my favorite time of the year. I love to wear sweaters, boots, and jackets. But, I also love Thanksgiving. I've always wanted a neat tradition for this holiday, but have always struckout. Most retailers skip this holiday, so not much out there for it.

A couple months ago my sister-in-law, Wendy, called me and asked if I wanted to make a "Blessings Jar." I had never heard of this. She expalined it to me. This is a Blessings Jar:



During the whole month of November you place this jar anywhere you want. At a specific time, or whenever, each day you write something you are thankful for. You do this until Thanksgiving. On Thanksgiving Day, you open it up and read the blessings. Simple.

I was excited to try this. With Wendy's help, I made my jar. I chose to place it at our kitchen table. And every night at dinner, we each took a turn to write something we are grateful for. My kids looked forward to it and did it without being reminded. On Thanksgiving we popped it open. Here are some of the things our family was grateful for:

- family: brothers, sisters, parents, cousins, grandmas, and grandpas, aunts and uncles
- our children
Ryan's good example, Aaron's willingness to help, Grace's sweetness, Ktes's happy smile, and Becca's energy
- our dog, Ace
- firends
- teachers
- an education
- church
- school
- the scriptures
- the temple
- Jesus
- a prophet
- faith
- shoes
- food
- the Earth
- cars
- bugs
- our house
- our bedrooms
- toys
- TV (it had to be said)

I'm thankful for the opportunity to have done this. It was a nice addition to our Thanksgiving.

This year we were able to have dinner at our house. We were lucky to celebrate with Dustin's parents and his brother, Spencer, and his wife, Ally. Grandma Nelson, Dustin's grandma, also joined the fun. We tried something new to the turkey, we fried it! Oh my goodness. It was YUMMY!! We were all stuffed to the core!! Good food. Good company. What more could you ask for?